It's official: this time the 90s comeback has gone way too far.

Look at Coachella's latest line-up and say it ain't so-oh-oh-oh-ooh.

NB: If you’re here expecting part two of my neighbours-at-war saga, don’t worry, it’s coming tomorrow. Set aside some time. First, I have something to say about this Coachella line-up.

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Blur?

Taking Back Sunday?

Deftones?

Sublime (without Rome)?

No Doubt?!?

If you’re putting together a throwback 90s playlist, sure, all those artists should be on there.

Likewise, if you’re trying to educate your kids on the artists you listened to when you were their age, you’d make them listen to songs by all those acts too.

But live, on the same festival bill, here, now, in 2024?

Not just any line-up, but that for the world’s biggest festival, the one every other festival owner looks at to set the trends, lay the path, and lead the way?

All those 90s bands are all playing at the next Coachella?!?

WTAF?!?

It’s true. Here’s the poster:

Honestly, yesterday’s announcement made me stop, stare and mouth the word, “Wow”.

I thought I was looking at one of those old Big Day Out posters from the 90s.

Why not just get Rammstein, Marilyn Manson, Fatboy Slim and Powderfinger on the bill and be done with it?

Fuck it, let’s reform Tadpole and just do this again, shall we?

Honestly, this is the weirdest Coachella line-up we’ve been delivered in a long time.

But maybe we shouldn’t be so surprised.

It’s been heading this way for a while.

Limp Bizkit sold out Spark Arena.

Live and Incubus are teaming up for two shows here in April.

Sublime (with Rome) had seven summer shows booked around Aotearoa until they cancelled at the last minute.

100 Gecs, who played an excellent Powerstation show here last July, mix ska, punk, dub and screamcore like they’re stuck in a 90s hyperpop jukebox.

Wednesday, the Southern-tinged grunge act who couldn’t show off their 90s debts anymore if they tried, will rock Whammy Bar in February.

Foo Fighters, a band I first saw opening for Sonic Youth in 1996, will perform at Mt Smart next weekend. Next month, Queens of the Stone Age, who were on the 2001 and 2003 Big Day Out line-ups, are here too.

Pearl Jam are rumoured to be coming later this year for the first time since 2014.

The kids dress like they’re already heading to a Big Day Out anyways.

So this is a Coachella line-up that proves several things:

• Coachella is no longer the dominant festival force it was;

• The 90s comeback has gone way too far;

• Hip-hop is no longer music’s biggest genre, nostalgia is;

• Unsure of the future, festival bookers are now looking to the past;

• And now we’ll have all kinds of defunct 90s acts dragged out, dusted off and chucked back on the festival circuit (Alien Ant Farm, anyone?).

• (Oh, also, The Beths, there in the small print on the Fridays, have made it to the big leagues. Yay!)

It proves something else too:

• We’re running out of festival headliners.

Coachella’s got Tyler, the Creator, Doja Cat and Lana Del Rey in the biggest font size, and while each has performed at the festival before, this will be their first as a headliner.

Are they up to it? Sure. Probably. I’m into them. Tyler’s my No. 1. But that’s not my point.

The others that could do it – let’s say The Weeknd, Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, Dua Lipa, Beyonce or Coldplay – are already touring their own shows playing to more people and making more money than they ever could across two weekends at Coachella.

They just don’t need the bump.

So, on a bill dominated by first-time headliners, the undercard is stacked full of 90s throwbacks. Don’t get me wrong: love me some Deftones, would jump in the mosh for ‘Beetlebum’ and I totally want to see what No Doubt looks like these days.

But it doesn’t feel very fresh, does it?

I warned about all this happening when picking my 2024 predictions. Interpol, Weezer, The Offspring, My Morning Jacket, and Miike Snow are suddenly playing festivals again. “As boom times continue for live music, there’s too much money to be made resurrecting the sounds of yesteryear,” I wrote.

I didn’t think Coachella would confirm my suspicions so blatantly just a week later, but here we are.

So, the big question is, would you go?

Should we go?

I’m always down for a festival, but I just don’t know if I need to travel all the way to the Californian desert to see this song played live again…

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